Editorialisation on the Danger of Butt Photos With Rollei 3.5f

Rollei 3.5f and the Danger of Butt Photos...

Here is a photo of the Rollei 3.5f, the first camera I bought with my own money.
I bought this at a garage sale for $25 in 1963 with Christmas and birthday money,
when I was 13. My father used it occasionally, but my stepmother never noticed it.
Anyway, I took it to my cousin Debbie's birthday beach party at Zuma, that
spring, and it got several of us in trouble.
Debbie had just turned 13 and looked like a dirty yellow mop, turned shag end up, with 2 large blue buttons and 2 fairy
cakes with pink frosting in the appropriate places in a red and white 1 piece with
ruffles on chest and butt and about 4' 6" tall. My cousin Billyjoe was 11. He and
I were both very small pudgy boys in blue shorts. My cousin Butchie, a majestic
highschooler in his own mind, was there with his date, a large, brunette, bottom
heavy girl, wearing a red and yellow polka-dot bikini, too narrow for her
butt-crack (bigger than him, and her name is forgotten). Her mother was there (and
was absolutely colossal in a hibiscus muumuu) along with Uncle Neil (who was drunk)
to chaparone all of us and several other innocent children. Also there was a large
OD colour tent.
When we were together, Debbie was Moe, and Billyjoe and I were Larry and Curley.
Debbie hated Butchie's girlfriend and insisted we needed a photo of her butt-crack
for future use.
I had the Rollei, loaded with Tri-X. Butt-girl was bent over, head in the food
basket, butt-crack wonderfully displayed. So, we snuck up behind her, Debbie
pushing on me, and snapped the photo.
Butt-girl noticed and came after us; we ran, but butt-girl was fast, so, I
lateraled the camera to Billyjoe, who threw a 40' Hail Mary pass to Debbie for
perfect reception.
Debbie then ran full tilt into butt-girl's mother, who took the camera away from
her, and stuffed it in her muumuu, down her decolletage (it fit). Debbie, Billyjoe,
and I were herded into the tent and told to stay there for 1 hour for "meanness and
egregious rudity". About 15 minutes later, butt-girl's mother kicked us out of the
tent and shoved butt-girl in there with a sweater covering her butt and told her
to stay 1 hour for "whining, butt crackage and egregious piggery". Butt-girl's mom
had, apparently, looked in the food basket and liked the word "egregious".
I didn't get the camera back that day, Butchie said he'd steal it back. About 2
weeks later, Uncle Neil drove over to our house (sober) and gave me back my camera.
It was empty. Butt-girl's mom probably shot the rest of the roll (about 6 left),
and that butt shot is in some forgotten photo album, 45 years in the past. I still
have the camera. It works great.
Butt shots are dangerous. Butt-girl could have caught us. She was about 5' 10"
and about 190lb.

butt photos danger editorial rollei 35f
Ricoh Caplio 500G
Los Angeles
United States


  1. paramir
    paramir ·

    great story! i'll try to keep it in mind. even though, when the butt-crack displays... it is hard to resist sometimes :)

  2. superlighter
    superlighter ·

    WOW WOW WOW!!!! I'm not sure I've understood the 100% of the "novel" (becouse of my self-learned English" but I've cought the sense and.....what a wonderful camera!!!

  3. rater
    rater ·

    Great story! Cameras are not just machines, but they have a soul... build with stories like yours!

  4. renaishashin
    renaishashin ·

    lol nice butt-girl story!

  5. halfawakehaiku
    halfawakehaiku ·

    cool story.

  6. lomosexual_manboy
    lomosexual_manboy ·

    Be quick or be dead.

  7. mrs-paul
    mrs-paul ·

    You write a good story Herbert... glad the Rollei survived!

  8. ziggy-s
    ziggy-s ·

    Funny stuff...great camera if only she could tell the rest of the story...like wheres that shot now..

  9. grenoouille
    grenoouille ·

    What a beauty! It gives the creeps knowing it has gone through so many dangers!!...

  10. stijn_b
    stijn_b ·

    Great story, surprised it fitted down her decolletage. The camera isn't particulary small!

  11. ifisheye
    ifisheye ·

    LOL very funny story

  12. ipdegirl
    ipdegirl ·

    BEAUTIFUL--and so is the story. Darn shame you don't have that photo. I'm laughing my butt-crack off now just thinking about that whole scene.

  13. gregschneider
    gregschneider ·

    Haven't seen much of your photography yet, but you're one heck of a writer. I totally enjoyed the beach account.

  14. shoujoai
    shoujoai ·

    haha :D some people are really rude with the films. My Ex-Boyfriend once destroyed a film cause I took a picture of him with a red thong!

  15. bensozia
    bensozia ·

    The photo's got to be out there somewhere Herb... In the meantime, find the girl and ask her to pose again!

  16. bccbarbosa
    bccbarbosa ·

    Beautiful camera!!

  17. filby
    filby ·

    Herb, you are a true legend :)

  18. kdstevens
    kdstevens ·

    Great camera. And what a price! In 1963 that thing was almost brand new. I was still selling them in the early 70's. I still have an automat from the 50's that I treasure.

  19. darryl1208
    darryl1208 ·

    A very fine camera, was the best of her days I think.
    And what does it show: European cameras are the best. Rollie TLR and Leicas of that time were fine and Hasselblad was on the moon and is still the best Middleformat you can get.

  20. pangmark
    pangmark ·

    cool story, shame about the missing film.

  21. robinansell
    robinansell ·

    Love the story, love the camera, and is that a guitar strap I see?

  22. eyecon
    eyecon ·

    Wow...great camera! But more interesting for me: Where did you get this fantastic strap?

  23. awesomesther
    awesomesther ·

    way too awesome.. no idea why I didn't see/read this earlier!

  24. jhtci
    jhtci ·

    fun story! great characters! if you don't mind i'm going to place a link to it on my facebook page.

  25. danbarry
    danbarry ·

    great story. lovely camera. i love TLR's Rollei's are the best, i hope one day to have one.

  26. trw
    trw ·

    ;-) Love the story and the camera!

  27. camielioo
    camielioo ·

    what a nice story! :)

  28. sandravo
    sandravo ·

    Hilarious! I'm usually not one to read lengthy photo descriptions, but this story was simply too good to stop! Laughing tears, that good!

  29. herbert-4
    herbert-4 ·

    @sandravo Here's the polished version of the story, enjoy: www.lomography.com/magazine/lifestyle/2011/12/17/rolleiflex…

  30. sandravo
    sandravo ·

    Even polished it is still a very funny, well written story!